Little crimes breed big crimes. You smile at little crimes and then big crimes blow your head off.

Any true wizard, faced with a sign like 'Do not open this door. Really. We mean it. We're not kidding. Opening this door will mean the end of the universe,' would automatically open the door in order to see what all the fuss is about. This made signs rather a waste of time, but at least it meant that when you handed what was left of the wizard to his grieving relatives you could say, as they grasped the jar, 'We told him not to."

As we all know, the Discworld is a flat planet - like a geological pizza, but without the anchovies.

There is no doubt that being human is incredibly difficult and cannot be mastered in one lifetime.

That's the Ankh-Morpork instinct, Vimes thought. Run away, and then stop and see if anything interesting is going to happen to other people.

It is said that whomsoever the gods wish to destroy, they first make mad. In fact, whomsoever the gods wish to destroy, they first hand the equivalent of a stick with a fizzing fuse and Acme Dynamite Company written on the side. It's more interesting, and doesn't take so long.

He sighed. It had come to this. He was a responsible authority, and people could use terms like "core values" at him with impunity.