The presence of those seeking the truth is infinitely to be preferred to the presence of those who think they've found it.

One minute I'm just another rabbit and happy about it, next minute *whazaam*, I'm thinking. That's a major drawback if you're looking for happiness as a rabbit, let me tell you. You want grass and sex, not thoughts like 'What's it all about, when you get right down to it?'

On the Disc, the Gods aren't so much worshipped, as they are blamed.

They were small, brightly coloured, happy little creatures who secreted some of the nastiest toxins in the world, which is why the job of looking after the large vivarium where they happily passed their days was given to first-year students, on the basis that if they got things wrong there wouldn't be too much education wasted.

When a man is tired of Ankh-Morpork, he is tired of ankle-deep slurry.

The female mind is certainly a devious one, my lord." Vetinari looked at his secretary in surprise. "Well, of course it is. It has to deal with the male one.

The brain works fast when it thinks it’s about to be cut in half.