The only guaranteed way to make something not very funny is to make it vague.

Waiting for opportunities in the entertainment industry is an impossibility; they are not coming. You have to make your own.

That's the other thing about working on movies, the commitment is years. That's one thing that's so frustrating about the process is that it goes on and on and on for years.

The level of acting that I bring to films in three dimensions. I hope they make people sign some kind of waiver because if their mind explodes from my acting in 3D, it's not my fault.

The good thing about being a writer is that you don't need anything except for a laptop. You can really do your own work and if you're not manically compelled to write all the time before you do it professionally, it's probably not a business for you anyway.

You hate to see yourself do one draft of a script and then have somebody else come back in and change what you've done.

I'm always doing what I can to look for and just feel out funny things that are happening in the scene and improvise off of them.