Demonstrating faith and optimism in the child or adolescent's ability to work things out in their own time and in their own way can be very difficult but it is possible to do this while also offering assistance.

Once parents have a clear idea of their important parenting goals, beliefs, and values, they can then think about specific situations and identify the outcomes they would like to achieve in these situations. How can you be the parent you want to be whether or not your children are behaving as you would prefer?

One of the most important goals to have may well be the goal to create the life you want without preventing other people from creating the life they want.

I always thought if you really want to be a good actor, you've got to be able to fart in public. That, to me, is the most important. If you are so inhibited that you can't fart, I don't mean around your friends, I mean just a fart, out loud somewhere. I don't mean the 'silent creeper', everybody does that. I mean fart out loud! Just that you can do it and not be afraid of it. Humility is very important.

The best way for parents to go about acquiring a mind-set of self-reflective parenting will be different for different individuals. Some people will find that they are already very close to being the parent they are striving to be. Other people will find reading books or blog articles to be very helpful and some other people might benefit most by engaging in discussions on the internet.

Seeking the counsel of trusted and respected health professionals can also be helpful in providing parents with some balance for their concerns as well as other avenues of support.

Sometimes offering support and making yourself available when the child or adolescent is ready to talk can be the most helpful you can be.