You hope people are going to be listening to you after you're gone. And they like you better after you're gone.

I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a prefrontal lobotomy.

The devil knows the Bible like the back of his hand...

Sometimes the magnetism of a song is impossible to ignore, and it demands that it be sung in a certain way.

The piano has been drinking, not me.

Presley's what I go by, why don't you change the station.

A mental midget with the IQ of a fence post.