Negative things you tell yourself are inCANTations, turn them into inCANtations.
If you can't, then you must!
If the results don't scream: "Do this again!" Try something new.
Change is inevitable. Progress is optional .
Regarding the psychological, your goal must not be "I need to lose X pounds" but "I'm going to regain my identity," whether as an athlete, a conservative, a sexual being, a together person, whatever.
The only person who is truly holding you back is you. No more excuses. It's time to change. It's time to live life at a new level.