Good day, fair maidens.

The Big Valbowski is a lot like a Hakeem Olajuwan, either he's taking the hook shot from the outside or driving down the lane on the inside, he always scores!

You know something, the Big Valboski is a lot like a Rubix Cube... the more you play with it, the harder it gets!

I guess getting down on your knees runs in the family

You know, the big Valbowski is a lot like concrete mix. You know? You just get it a little wet, take a step back, and watch it get ROCK HARD!

The Big Valbowski is kinda like a pool just jump right in and get wet!!

This leg will be known as Christmas, and this leg will be known as New Year's Eve! Ladies...why don't you all come visit the Big Valbowski between the holidays.