I am a living soap opera.

England is the only civilised country in the world where it is etiquette to fall on the food like a wolf the moment it is served. Elsewhere it is comme il faut to wait until everybody has helped himself to everything and until everything on everybody's plate is stone cold.

The women sit, getting colder and colder, on a seat getting harder and harder, watching oafs, getting muddier and muddier.

Be blind. Be stupid. Be British. Be careful.

For a driver to be driven by somebody else is an ordeal, for there are only three types of drivers: the too fast, the timid and oneself.

Say something idiotic and nobody but a dog politely wags his tail.

Maturity gives us jealous eyes. We look with jealousy on the younger woman because she doesn't know as much now as we do, and, oh, what we could do with our wisdom and her face.