My notion of a wife at 40 is that a man should be able to change her, like a bank note, for two 20s.

I'm not going to call a dog "Dog." I suppose if she were a baby you'd cal her "Person."

I don't think there's anything to be admired in lying, cheating or philandering. But there might be something to be admired in not burning people at the stake because they have those weaknesses.

Always thank your nurse. Sometimes they're the only one between you and a hearse.

I believe that DVD is that which gives some hope to retaining some content in movies that will appeal to an older audience or the more sophisticated audience or the audience that doesn't need or desire to see a movie on a Friday night.

There seems to be something wrong with our bloody ships today.

Marriage requires a special talent, like acting. Monogamy requires genius.