I've got no dark secrets, I wasn't beaten up, my parents were kind to me and there was a low crime rate where we lived. Maybe that's where the comedy comes from, as some sort of reaction to the safe, boring suburbs.

I would think beer and football go hand in hand.

Why not work with your friends? It's working with people you know, and you share the same sensibility.

I'm really an artist of feeling. I like creating things when it feels right.

I'm professional, I'm allowed to say this. I let him lick my balls. So, that's what you need to get close with your animal.

You did it! Congratulations! World's best cup of coffee! Great job, everybody! It's great to be here.

I remember going with my mom to a random garage sale as a kid and thinking what a cool treasure hunt that whole world was. Only to transition as an adult to think, 'What a gross place that really is.'