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Who is Barack Obama? Contrary to the rumors you have heard, I was not born in a manger. I was actually born on Krypton and sent here by my father Jor-El to save the Planet Earth. Many of you know that I got my name, Barack, from my father. What you may not know is Barack is actually Swahili for 'That One.' And I got my middle name from somebody who obviously didn't think I'd ever run for president. If I had to name my greatest strength, I guess it would be my humility. Greatest weakness, it's possible that I'm a little too awesome.
Barack ObamaBarack Obama was speaking to a Jewish group, and he told them that his name Barack is the same as the Jewish word 'baruch,' which means one who's blessed. That's what he said, yeah. Obama had a harder time explaining his middle name, Hussein. Things got quiet there.
Conan O'BrienI'm proud of our country that we elected Barack Obama. I mean, it says something about us nationally. You know, it's kind of like crowning your checker when you get to the end of your checker board. Here's another thing that says America's special: Barack Obama, president of the United States.
Tom CoburnQuite frankly, Barack Obama knows what it's like to pay a mortgage and student loans. He knows what it's like to watch a beloved family member in a medical crisis and worry that treatment is out of reach. Barack Obama knows our struggles. And, my friends, he shares our values.
Ted StricklandThis administration, Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton through their foreign policy, have betrayed the American people, because the weakness they've displayed has led to Putin's incursions in the Middle East and in eastern Europe, and has led - has led to significant problems in the Middle East as well, and the death and murder of lots of folks.
Chris ChristieIf humanity has any hope of effecting real change for the better, it will not come from the Madison Avenue false reality makers who've cast Barack Obama as the savior of the world. To alter our course from tyranny to liberty, to defeat the corrupt elite, we must get past the puppets and confront the real power structure of the planet.
Alex JonesI don't know if [Barack Obama] saw the latest religion survey, but almost a quarter of the country are Nones. I don't mean the ones who hit me on the knuckles with a ruler in Sunday School - I mean they put "None" for religion.
Bill MaherBarack Obama's been president for about eight hours; President Obama was here for eight years. So if you want to talk about numbers that matter, it's quantifying all the losses - the women who were slid into poverty, those who can't find meaningful work, and their children who deserve a better life.
Kellyanne ConwayI believe in a America first foreign policy, that far too often President [Barack] Obama and Hillary Clinton - and, unfortunately, more than a few Republicans - have gotten distracted from the central focus of keeping this country safe.
Ted CruzThe realities are that, you know, as a black man, you know, Barack can get shot going to the gas station, you know.
Michelle ObamaI still remember how upset I was in the aftermath of President Obama's election, where people in Republican leadership didn't say that, "Hey, I want to focus on the issues and values of our country," but, "My number one goal is to see that Barack Obama is not a two term president." That to me is outrageous. I would never do that. My number one goal is to fight to protect poor people, ethnic and religious minorities, working class folks.
Cory BookerIt is true that the Drive-By Media is not spending a lot of time covering the Donald Trump Middle East trip. The reason is, they don't want to write or televise any of this because it's in such stark contrast to the pictures they've been painting of Trump. It's so incongruent. It's so inconsistent. In addition to all else, it is the protection of the Barack Obama legacy.
Rush LimbaughFate handed Barack Obama the best of all political gifts - a dyspeptic, surly, spiteful opposition on the one hand and very unpopular financiers on the other - and he wouldn't come out punching, name names, or go for the jugular. It was as if while getting mugged by guys with brass knuckles, he turned the other cheek. He even jeopardized his pledge to preserve women's rights under Roe v. Wade in order to get a health care bill written by the corporate lapdog Max Baucus and the gang of revolving door mercenaries he hired to write a bill friendly to industry.
Bill MoyersMaybe Republicans should get nukes and the president [Barack Obama] will talk to them.
Andrea TantarosTo the parents, basically, of the dreamers, which was DAPA. I understand, of course, the concern that a lot of folks have had with the number of deportations. But there again, I believe that the president [Barack Obama] has made an earnest attempt to address those issues.
Julian CastroWhen Hillary Clinton ran against Senator [Barack] Obama she thought him naive because he thought it was a good idea to talk to our enemies. I think those are exactly the people you have to talk to and you have to negotiate with.
Bernie SandersRemember, the enemy comes to kill still and destroy. But now they're going to inspect themselves? Oh, what could go wrong with that? Yes, don't call us. We'll call you, they say. And that's really good because [Barack] Obama is standing by with his mighty phone and his mighty pen in case they stretch the truth a little. And they start dropping bombs.
Sarah PalinThe bottom line is if the president [Barack Obama] really wants to keep guns out of the hands of criminals, maybe his Justice Department should stop releasing felons, many of which are illegal immigrants, only to the streets of America.
Katie PavlichMao Tse Tung lives and his name is Barack Hussein Obama. This country should be ashamed. I wanna throw up.
Ted NugentI'm praying for Barack Obama to stay on the tightrope because I want to fight his right-wing critics. I want to down I want to ensure they don't lie about him. I'm sure they don't demonize him, and too much of that is going on. So I don't want my critiques to be in any way confused with the right-wing critiques, even though I'll fight for the right wing to be wrong in that regard.
Cornel WestAnd Barack and I were raised with so many of the same values, like you work hard for what you want in life. That your word is your bond; that you do what you say you're going to do. That you treat people with dignity and respect, even if you don't know them and even if you don't agree with them.
Michelle ObamaBarack Obama became president, and he abandoned Iraq. He left, and when he left Al Qaida was done for. ISIS was created because of the void that we left, and that void now exists as a caliphate the size of Indiana.
Jeb Bush[John] McCain seemed to be winking to the Right, and [Barack] Obama seemed to be winking to the Left. Neither one of them - if McCain had been elected we'd still be where we are on gay rights.
Bill AyersLiberals never, ever drop a heinous idea; they just change the name. Abortion becomes choice, communist becomes progressive, communist dictatorship becomes people's democratic republic and Nikita Khrushchev becomes Barack Obama.
Ann CoulterI happen to believe that if we want to replace a lifetime politician like Barack Obama, who had no experience leading anything... We've got to nominate a leader if we're going to replace someone who is not a leader.
Mitt RomneyI have the picture of Barack [Obama] and me dancing right outside of my dressing room door, I see it every single day, and it makes me very happy.
Ellen DeGeneresSen. Joe Biden, on the day of announcing his candidacy for president of the United States, called Barack Obama the first mainstream African-American who is articulate, bright, and . . . clean. I think we've seen the shortest presidential campaign in history.
Jay LenoWhat happened in Syria was, President [Barack] Obama had made a statement announcing what he called his "red line": You can't use chemical weapons, you can do anything else but [use] chemical weapons.
Noam ChomskyThere is some good news for John McCain. According to the latest polls, which came out today, John McCain has started to open up a lead over Barack Obama. This is true. Yeah. The USA Today poll has McCain ahead by ten points. The 'CBS News' poll has the two tied. And the MSNBC poll says that Obama won the election last week.
Conan O'BrienIn the end, that's what it comes down to with Mitt Romney. He's running as the non-Barack Obama.
Howie CarrSo here you have Barack Obama going in and spending the money on embryonic stem cell research. Eugenics.
Glenn BeckI think Malcolm Forbes got kicked out of our school and [Ethiopian Emperor] Hallie Selassie's grandkids went there, too. Because of security reasons you have to go to those schools. We had a privileged life, fine, but also very secure. So I think it's great where the [Barack] Obama daughters are going to school.
Malaak ShabazzPresident [Barack] Obama has talked about fundamentally transforming this country. There's 7 billion people across the face of the globe, many of whom want to come to this country. If they come legally, great. But if they come illegally and they get amnesty, that is how we fundamentally change this country, and it really is striking.
Ted CruzWe're looking at a president [Barack Obama] who's engaged in double-speak where he doesn't call radical Islamic terrorism by its name. Indeed, he gives a speech after the San Bernardino attack where his approach is to try to go after the constitutional rights of law-abiding citizens rather than to keep us safe.
Ted CruzI've met them [Barack and Michelle Obama] before at fundraisers and things. But to actually meet them in the space where they dwell and make the most important decisions is a totally different experience.
MC LyteObama's got a health care logo that's right out of Adolf Hitler's playbook ... Adolf Hitler, like Barack Obama, also ruled by dictate.
Rush LimbaughSomething very significant appears to be happening in America. There is a dramatic shift in voter affinity toward the GOP, and it may prove to be the mountain-too-high for Barack Obama's campaign.
Bob BeauprezEveryone is so concerned now where all of the candidates are born. McCain was born on a military base in Panama. Hillary was born outside Chicago, and if you believe the media, Barack Obama was born in a manger.
Jay LenoWhy is the media doing what they're doing? Well, there are many answers for it. I don't mean to be insulting anybody here. Clearly, the media hates Trump, yeah, and clearly the media's a bunch of leftists and they don't like Trump's policies, and clearly this and clearly that. But there's another factor to this, too, that I don't think can be denied - and I think they're scared to death. Donald Trump is unraveling, bit by bit, major elements of the Barack Obama agenda.
Rush LimbaughIt doesn't matter to me where Barack Obama goes. If he wants to go to Hawaii because it's his home state, fine! Hunky-dory. Plastic banana, good-time rock 'n' roller dittos.
Rush LimbaughHonestly, that puts a lot of weight on your shoulders because you're representing so many great people who want to see so much. And they're hungry for ... I hate to use the word change because [Barack] Obama used to use that word ... but they're hungry for real change; they're hungry for making things right.
Donald TrumpHe [Barack Obama] talked about a crisises and he was blaming the Republicans on this crisises. It's like me blaming my wife for my drinking. I don't se how this is the Republicans fault.
Barack ObamaHillary Clinton and Barack Obama, never being in business, never really negotiating, give away for nothing things they shouldn't give away.
Rudy GiulianiBecause of all our presidents, Barack Obama is the one most likely to be descended from a slave trader, since Kenya had a major slave-trading port, and the Muslims were heavily involved in the slave trade.
Ann CoulterBarack Obama says what he has to say as a politician. I say what I have to say as a pastor. But they're two different worlds.
Jeremiah WrightThe biggest problem this world has today is not President [Barack] Obama with global warming, which is inconceivable, this is what he's saying. The biggest problem we have is nuclear - nuclear proliferation and having some maniac, having some madman go out and get a nuclear weapon. That's in my opinion, that is the single biggest problem that our country faces.
Donald Trump