I really get a little bit confused by all this "angry angry angry" talk when all I do is tell jokes and at least some people find it funny.

When the news is slow, or when there's just so many other responsibilities bearing down on me that I don't have the time to do it right, that's when it gets frustrating. As an artist, you just don't wanna put bad work out. So when you have to do it seven days a week, you're just gonna have some bad days and bad weeks and bad months and bad years.

I think you have to play the game on every level. If you need a friendly, charismatic, good-looking guy to be the mouthpiece, then so be it. And maybe Ralph Nader should just be behind the scenes telling that guy what to say.

I really get a little bit confused by all this "angry angry angry" talk when all I do is tell jokes and at least some people find it funny.

Don't get me wrong, it definitely ain't the Democratic Party either. They're so bad, I mean I'm actually starting to believe that John Kerry was just token resistance, that he literally was down with George W.Bush. It was just such a horrible, horrible, horrible thing to see, that campaign. So, you know, I don't know what's going on.

I don't want the news to be patriotic. I don't want to see flags on the lapels of the anchors. I don't want any of that.

We don't need a two-party system. We need something else. Because at this point, the two-party system is really just a one-party system. And that one party is crumbling.