Bob Dole used to be really funny. Barney Frank can be kind of funny. Bob Kerrey has a good sense of humor.

I couldn't think of anything less appealing than molding the minds of tomorrow's leaders.

For 35 years I was a writer. I wrote a lot of jokes. Some of them weren’t funny. Some of them weren’t appropriate. Some of them were downright offensive. I understand that.

My parents didn't make a lot of money. My dad was not a high school graduate - he didn't have a career as such; he was a printing salesman essentially for most of his working life.

Most of us here in the media are what I call infotainers...Rush Limbaugh is what I call a disinfotainer. He entertains by spreading disinformation.

I don't know what happens to you after you die. I'm not banking on there being, like, a heaven.

I'm a bit of a shill for the Clinton Administration, which has its perks. I'm invited to all the inaugural balls.