The only reason I got into broadcasting was, I needed money to pay for my junior and senior years at college, and they hired me, those fools!

Don't tell me what you believe in. I'll observe how you behave and I will make my own determination.

The secret to happiness, of course, is not getting what you want; it's wanting what you get.

I'm curious about everything - even things that don't interest me.

I don't gamble, because winning a hundred dollars doesn't give me great pleasure. But losing a hundred dollars pisses me off.

Sex? Unfortunately, as you get older - and I shouldn't admit this - there are other things that become more important in your daily life.

People ask me, How would you do as a contestant on the show? And I tell them I would do fairly well among senior citizens, but against a good thirty-year-old I would have trouble because I cannot recall information as quickly as I used to. You used to say something and I would go, boom, right away, very sharp. Now it's like, Oh, yes, but wait a minute, uh, uh.