Being natural is one of the most irritating poses I know in people.

Will I have to use a dictionary to read your book?" asked Mrs. Dodypol. "It depends," says I, "how much you used the dictionary before you read it.

Ordinary persons, he said, smiling, found no differences between men. The artist found them all.

I hate injustice, I despise inequity, I condemn hypocrisy, I abhor the lack of reason.

The man who has faith in logic is always cuckolded by reality.

The ears, which master the face of a dunce, are that part of the head which most publishes stupidity.

The parrot holds its food for prim consumption as daintily as any debutante, [with] a predilection for pot roast, hashed-brown potatoes, duck skin, butter, hoisin sauce, sesame seed oil, bananas and human thumb.