A lot of those comics can't hold down relationships and they've got no other life apart from performing. They sleep in their Jags and a lot of them can't even talk. All they can do is tell gags.

If I won the lottery I'd start a charity that helped little family hardware stores, cobblers and fruit shops open in city centres.

I exist as an annexe of the BBC. I'm down the road a bit from the main building, in a little hut.

Americans have different ways of saying things. They say 'elevator', we say 'lift'... they say 'President', we say 'stupid psychopathic git.

A lot of those comics can't hold down relationships and they've got no other life apart from performing. They sleep in their Jags and a lot of them can't even talk. All they can do is tell gags.

I think that my ideas of the world are that it's random and cruel but kind of quite comical really, and therefore the humour, in a sense, springs from that.

I don't think people were that interested in what I was doing for the most of the 1990s.