A lot of movies are about life, mine are like a slice of cake.

I'm a writer and, therefore, automatically a suspicious character.

Television is like the invention of indoor plumbing. It didn't change people's habits. It just kept them inside the house.

I enjoy playing the audience like a piano.

There are several differences between a footballl game and a revolution. For one thing, a football game usually lasts longer and the participants wear uniforms. Also there are more injuries at a football game.

I'm frightened of eggs, worse than frightened, they revolt me.

Self-plagiarism is style.