I don't even know what would have happened to me had I not become a model. I don't know if I would have gotten out of Oklahoma. I was so young when things started happening for me and I realized I could make a living.

My agent, Didier Fernandez - who's been my agent since I was 18 - has definitely been a mentor and a protector and a trusted friend.

We are quite small in the big scheme of things.

I don't really want to control anyone, to be honest.

I knew I liked art. I knew I liked photography. I remember seeing photos of Linda Evangelista in Italian Vogue as a teenager, and at the time I didn't know who she was. There were two photos - one shot by Fabrizio Ferri and another one by Steven Meisel. I didn't know who any of those people were. I think it was the first summer I was modeling, I saw these magazines sitting out and looked at them. I remember thinking, These are the kind of images I want to make.

We are what we see. We are products of our surroundings.

I am running on fumes, so it's time to get centered again. I start with eating healthier and cutting out caffeine - at least cutting back on caffeine. I exercise and get outside to play. I reconnect with my spiritual practice, which is daily meditation and prayer. Most importantly, I reconnect with my family and friends. If all else fails, a few deep breaths.