Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.

All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.

The place whereon the priest formerly raveled out the small intestine of the sacrificial victim for purposes of divination and cooked its flesh for the gods. The word is now seldom used, except with reference to the sacrifice of their liberty and peace by a male and a female fool.

Cynicism is that blackguard defect of vision which compels us to see the world as it is, instead of as it should be.

Friendless. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense.

PLENIPOTENTIARY, adj. Having full power. A Minister Plenipotentiary is a diplomatist possessing absolute authority on condition that he never exert it.

What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.