My youngest sister, Cindy, has Down syndrome, and I remember my mother spending hours and hours with her, teaching her to tie her shoelaces on her own, drilling multiplication tables with Cindy, practicing piano every day with her. No one expected Cindy to get a Ph.D.! But my mom wanted her to be the best she could be, within her limits.
Amy ChuaAll decent parents want to do what's best for their children. The Chinese just have a totally different idea of how to do that.
Amy ChuaI was raised, myself, by extremely strict but also extremely loving Chinese immigrant parents. To this day, I believe that their having high expectations for me, coupled with love, was the greatest gift that anyone's ever given me. And so that's why, even though my husband is not Chinese, I try to raise my own two daughters the same way.
Amy ChuaWestern parents try to respect their childrenโs individuality, encouraging them to pursue their true passions, supporting their choices, and providing positive reinforcement and a nurturing environment. By contrast, the Chinese believe that the best way to protect their children is by preparing them for the future, letting them see what theyโre capable of, and arming them with skills, work habits, and inner confidence that no one can ever take away.
Amy ChuaKids raised to be pampered and spoiled don't really end up being good leaders. Leaders need to be independent minded and confident.
Amy ChuaWesterners often laud their children as 'talented' or 'gifted', while Asian parents highlight the importance of hard work. And in fact, research performed by Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck has found that the way parents offer approval affects the way children perform, even the way they feel about themselves.
Amy Chua