However, if you do start crying in an argument and someone asks why, you can always say, 'I'm just crying because of how wrong you are.'

Change is the only constant. Learn to surf your life instead of planting your feet.

Believe me, blond hair can take you really far, especially with the older men. It can really distract from the face. I am convinced I could have had sex with both Tony Bennett and John McCain if we weren't each happily married at the time we all met.

If I wanted to see Jonah Hill masturbate at a pool party, I'd go to one of Jonah Hill's pool parties.

In a recent Valentine's Day posting on her fan website, Britney Spears says that - oh, who cares?

New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin said that New Orleans, when rebuilt, will be a chocolate city. And he will be the delicious nut in the center.

I had no idea how to get guys to notice me. I still don't. Who cares?