A top McCain policy adviser claimed this week that McCain's work in the Senate helped create the BlackBerry, saying, 'You're looking at the miracle that John McCain helped create.' He then handed the BlackBerry to McCain, who attempted to withdraw $20 from it.
Amy PoehlerI worked at an ice cream parlor called Chadwicks. We wore old-timey outfits and had to bang a drum, play a kazoo, and sing 'Happy Birthday' to people while giving them free birthday sundaes. Lots of ice cream scooping and $1 tips.
Amy PoehlerThere's only, like, five perfectly symmetrical people in the world, and they're all movie stars, and they should be, because their faces are very pleasing to look at, but the rest of us are just a jangle of stuff, and the earlier you learn that you should focus on what you have and not obsess about what you don't have, the happier you will be.
Amy PoehlerIn my twenties I tried cocaine, which I instantly loved but eventually hated. Cocaine is terrific if you want to hang out with people you don't know very well and play Ping-Pong all night. It's bad for almost everything else.
Amy PoehlerMy idea of the perfect exercise class is this: The teacher gives us all a hug and goes, โYou did it! You showed up! Letโs lie down.โ We all lie down and sheโs like, โHow is everybody feeling?โ Weโre like, โGreat!โ And the teacherโs like, โGreat!โ Then we all get to leave 20 minutes early.
Amy Poehler