Always remember your kid’s name. Always remember where you put your kid. Don’t let your kid drive until their feet can reach the pedals. Use the right size diapers…for yourself. And, when in doubt, make funny faces.

Both conservatives and liberals watch 'Parks and Recreation,' and they each think the show is for them, which is really cool. 'SNL' was totally different. It was exciting because everyone was paying attention. Political humor works when people know what you're talking about.

Stop whining about getting old. It's a privilege. A lot of people who are dead wish they were still alive.

When you're doing sketch comedy and you're pregnant, it's like wearing a giant sombrero in every sketch.

You become more attractive when you love yourself. You ATTRACT the right things when you have a sense of who you are.

Great people do things before they're ready. They do things before they know they can do it. Doing what you're afraid of, getting out of your comfort zone, taking risks like that - that is what life is. You might be really good. You might find out something about yourself that's really special and if you're not good, who cares? You tried something. Now you know something about yourself.

Sometimes you need to know to quit while you're ahead or at least before things get much worse!