I'm not extra sensitive to handshakes. I shake hands all the time.

Don't feel bad for me. I think I'm, like, so pretty.

I finally just slept with my high school crush. But I swear; now he expects me to go to his graduation - like I know where I'm going to be in three years.

I just say what I think is the funniest thing I could say. I'm not trying to make headlines. I'm just trying to say the stuff that I think is funny and will make people laugh.

The moments that make life worth living are when things are at their worst and you find a way to laugh.

I've never slept with anyone who could help me at all. No one. I wish I had. If anything, everyone I've had sex with has been a real step in the wrong direction.

We had to break up, though. We wanted different things - like he wanted kids and I wanted him to hear.