The Humane Society of America thinks Michael Vick should have a dog. I think whoever's in charge there should have a lobotomy.

The third person narrator, instead of being omniscient, is like a constantly running surveillance tape.

Building a mechanical device for its appearance is like putting lace on a bowling ball.

Stealing to eat ain’t criminal—stealing to be rich is.

Be he the first to stand or the last, a man must stand," the father had told his adoring son. "And if there is only one man, then that man must stand alone." ~Thomas to Bruce Wayne

Cats are the lap-dancers of the animal world. Soon as you stop shelling out, they move on, find another lap. They're furry little sociopaths. Pretty and slick -- in love with themselves. When's the last time you saw a seeing-eye cat?

The idea that you're not a writer until you're published is a lie.