Maybe the reason my memory is so bad is that I always do at least two things at once. It's easier to forget something you only half-did or quarter did.

I always like to see if the art across the street is better than mine.

It would be very glamorous to be reincarnated as a great big ring on Liz Taylor's finger.

I'm bored with that line. I never use it anymore. My new line is 'In 15 minutes everybody will be famous.'

I never fall apart, because I never fall together.

Everything is more glamorous when you do it in bed anyway.

I like to be the right thing in the wrong space and the wrong thing in the right space. But usually being the right thing in the wrong space and the wrong thing in the right space is worth it, because something funny always happens.