Liberals Love America Like O.J. Loved Nicole

In June 2002, airport security searched Al Gore. There's a lot not to like about Gore, but he's not a terrorist. Gore said he was glad he was searched. Why? To spare a terrorist the trouble? This is a serious national issue; why must liberals lie? Searching Al Gore is purely a religious act. It is the purposeless fetishistic performance of ritual in accordance with the civic religion of liberalism.

I note that [Benazir] Bhutto demonstrates her own deep commitment to democracy by giving herself the title chairperson for life of the Pakistan Peoples Party.

When Minutemen leader Jim Gilchrist and his black colleague Marvin Stewart were invited by the College Republicans to speak at Columbia last year, the tolerant, free-speech-loving Columbia students violently attacked them, shutting down the speech.

I've decided to cut out the part of the speech where I say anything nice about Democrats.

There's been another mass shooting by a crazy person, and liberals still refuse to consider institutionalizing the dangerously mentally ill.

Canada used to be...one of our most...most loyal friends, and vice versa. I mean, Canada sent troops to Vietnam. Was Vietnam less containable and more of a threat than Saddam Hussein?