I'm a decent cook; I'm a decent chef. None of my friends would ever have hired me at any point in my career. Period.

There's always this assumption that you're going to get everything right immediately. And any professional understands that that's just not so.

If you've ever hauled a 28-pound two-year-old around New York, you'll find that men fold at the knees a lot quicker than women.

I couldn't imagine a more unreliable, more unprofitable way to make a living than writing. My advice? Show up, do the best you can. Keep your day job. If you get a lucky break, don't f*** up. It was helpful to be older because I had made all the really stupid mistakes already.

I'm a decent cook; I'm a decent chef. None of my friends would ever have hired me at any point in my career. Period.

Silly trends don't last long. A lot of this nonsense that pops up, I don't even really pay attention because it'll be gone in a flash.

If somebody crafts an interesting tweet that’ll lead me to their blog, I’m going to their blog.