Like cubic zirconia, I only look real. I'm an imposter. The fact is, I am not like other people.
Augusten BurroughsIf I were blind I'd rather have another blind person leading me around because they know what I'm dealing with and they're experiencing the same things.
Augusten BurroughsYou can make almost anything a learning or positive experience. I think I offer a good example of how to make the most out of what life gives you and how to keep moving on.
Augusten BurroughsMy instinct was always have your gun in your hand. Especially when you are telling somebody to do something. But, in fact, the police academy discourages this. They feel your gun should rarely, if ever, be brought out of its holster. Most certainly not when children are involved, which is exactly when I saw myself using my gun most often. A truant teenager loitering outside a movie theater is going to be far more motivated to return to school when he has the barrel of a .45 pressed against his cheek.
Augusten Burroughs