Exaggeration is the cheapest form of humor.

In the silence I heard Bastet, who had retreated under the bed, carrying on a mumbling, profane monologue. (If you ask how I knew it was profane, I presume you have never owned a cat.)

..he continues to cling to the forlorn hope that I will turn into one of those swooning females...and fling myself squeeling at him whenever anything happens. Like all men, he clings to his illusions.

The combination of physical strength and moral sincerity combined with tenderness of heart is exactly what is wanted in a husband.--Ameila Peabody

Superstition has its practical uses.

A man asking for help ought to at least give directions.

I can do a book in three months if I spend all day, seven days a week at it and, in fact, I work better that way.