I just got diagnosed with tendonitis which is such an insulting diagnosis. Just point to my shoulder and say "old."

I can't do Christopher Walken impressions anymore, thanks [Barack] Obama.

As you go on you realize "Okay I know how to get laughs but am I saying things I want to say? Am I writing jokes that I like?" You get to a point that is that so you move on.

The audience is your first collaborator with the material. If that makes sense.

One time I was really close to Steve Martin. I was too afraid to actually go talk to him, but I'll count that as meeting.

I read recently that I was born in Arizona. I wasn't born in Arizona. I was born in New Mexico, but I can understand why people might confuse those two Southwestern desert states.

When you do comedy, the audience is not your boss. They are your collaborators and when you collaborate with someone you don't have to listen to everything they think or say. Sometimes you're not getting the laughs you want or at the place you want but that doesn't mean it's not funny. It means you haven't explored it enough. I'll get laughs in the places I don't want them and that makes me realize the direction I want to go in.