I still think it's important for people to have a sharp, ongoing critique of marriage in patriarchal society โ because once you marry within a society that remains patriarchal, no matter how alternative you want to be within your unit, there is still a culture outside you that will impose many, many values on you whether you want them to or not.
Bell HooksI want there to be a place in the world where people can engage in one anotherโs differences in a way that is redemptive, full of hope and possibility. Not this โIn order to love you, I must make you something elseโ. Thatโs what domination is all about, that in order to be close to you, I must possess you, remake and recast you.
Bell HooksIf you're in a domestic situation where the man is violent, patriarchy and male domination - even though you understand it intersectionally - you focus, you highlight that dimension of it, if that's what is needed to change the situation.
Bell HooksWhy is it so difficult for many white folks to understand that racism is oppressive not because white folks have prejudicial feelings about blacks (they could have such feelings and leave us alone) but because it is a system that promotes domination and subjugation?
Bell HooksPart of the racialized sexism wants everyone to think that a 15-year old Mexican is not a girl, sheโs a woman. We know sheโs a girl. We can never emphasize this enough, because this is the fate of colored girls globally right now: the denial of their girlhood, the denial of their childhood, and the constant state of risk and danger they are living in.
Bell Hooks