We're all divine, but I was the only one who had the nerve to call myself that.

There's the media-driven universe, in which the public perceives you in a superficial way. Then there's the universe that you actually inhabit, where you have to get up even if you didn't sleep so well, and you feel like crap and your face is swollen.

For days on end, I would hardly speak, and when I did only the vilest sort of gibberish would spout forth. I became morose and fat. Unapproachable, except when eating - and then only by waiters.

Enough about me. What do you think about me?

I hope to keep entertaining in some way until I can't physically entertain any longer. It's what I was born to do, and I love this profession.

A lot of people say that my life is wasted on me because I could be a bigger asshole than I am, but I've chosen not to be.

I firmly believe that with the right footwear one can rule the world.