You may find that your parents are the most delightful people, but you don't want to live with them.

Language is more fashion than science, and matters of usage, spelling and pronunciation tend to wander around like hemlines.

It was an especially wonderful time to be a noisy moron.

Boston's freeway system is insane. It was clearly designed by a person who had spent his childhood crashing toy trains.

That's the trouble with losing your mind; by the time it's gone, it's too late to get it back.

The best that can be said for Norwegian television is that it gives you the sensation of a coma without the worry and inconvenience.

I was heading to Nebraska. Now there's a sentence you don't want to say too often if you can possibly help it.