Taxonomy is described sometimes as a science and sometimes as an art, but really it’s a battleground.

I have long known that it is part of God's plan for me to spend a little time with each of the most stupid people on earth.

No one knows, incidentally, why Australia's spiders are so extravagantly toxic; capturing small insects and injecting them with enough poison to drop a horse would appear to be the most literal case of overkill. Still, it does mean that everyone gives them lots of space.

It is not true that the English invented cricket as a way of making all other human endeavors look interesting and lively; that was merely an unintended side effect... It is the only sport that incorporates meal breaks. It is the only sport that shares its name with an insect. It is the only sport in which spectators burn as many calories as players - more if they are moderately restless.

More than 300 million people in the world speak English and the rest, it sometimes seems, try to.

I could spend my life arriving each evening in a new city.

There is always a little more toothpaste in the tube. Think about it.