If you're on social media as a performer you can tell. If you don't get any Tweets you know it's bombed. I can pretty much gauge how it's doing by comparing the reception to shows I've done that have actual ratings.

Comedians have the ability to feel other emotions.

I am so pro-swine flu it's - it's like ridiculous.

I'm a standup comedian who gets to act. I'm never going to not do standup. I love doing it and when I go through periods where I'm doing a lot of acting work, I still do standup.

Haven't you noticed that every time the government f-ks up McDonald's has a new sandwich?

I used to think you had to live this miserable life and that that would make you funnier, but you don't. The misery will come. The misery will find you.

Inter-racial sex is probably some of the best sex on the planet. You know what that is? Because with inter-racial sex there's like this whole added pressure to perform. 'Cause it's kinda like you're not just humping for yourself. You're humping for your race. You got to represent your people.