The Republicans proved they are not the party of 'no.' They're the party of 'f**k, no!'

In fact, because people are religious, they think they can do bad things.

Hillary Clinton and Nancy Reagan have a lot in common - they're both smarter than their husbands and both consulted the stars for guidance, Nancy with astrology and Hillary with Barbra Streisand.

Nobody sees people as people. It's all how they relate to my little group.

The public is gullible. ... If [many satirists are] making the same joke, that's the danger. Then there's a solidifying effect and it becomes a truth.

I'm worried about a permanent Republican majority. That's what I'm worried about for the future.

Wichita Falls, Texas is considering using toilet water for drinking. And a dog there today said, 'White people's problems.'