Democrats are lame. The media is lame. And Donald Trump hasn't even played his war card yet. You know, he could start a war and get a lot of support there.
Bill MaherSarah Palin's whole family got into a drunken public fistfight. Something police are calling a 'tragic case of trash-on-trash violence.'
Bill MaherI kid Fox News, but they may be a little biased. We had an earthquake here on Monday, and they reported that 'the earth's crust was emboldened by Obama's weakness.'
Bill MaherMaybe every other American movie shouldn't be based on a comic book. Other countries will think Americans live in an infantile fantasy land where reality is whatever we say it is and every problem can be solved with violence.
Bill MaherA new cologne is coming out. It's for cowboys, and it's made from cow's manure. That way the women will be on you like flies!
Bill MaherYou're either a rationalist, or you're not. And the good news is a recent poll found 20% of adults under 30 say they are rationalists, and have figured out that Santa Claus and Jesus are really the same guy. Now, 20% is hardly a majority. But it's a bigger minority than blacks, jews, homosexuals, NRA members, teachers, or seniors... and it's certainly enough to stop being shy about expressing the opinion that we're not the crazy ones!
Bill Maher