When you realize you want to invest the rest of your lifestyle with somebody, you want the rest of your life to commence as quickly as achievable.

At some point I stopped stand-up because I didn't have something to say on a nightly basis.

I didn't rebel as a child. I missed that angry teenager thing.

I used to limp around my neighborhood imitating him. I did my Bar Mitzvah with an Oklahoma drawl.

I'm a sucker for a free tuxedo.

What's so fascinating and frustrating and great about life is that you're constantly starting over, all the time, and I love that.

To be good, you need to believe in what you're doing.