Everyone just wants to hear the exact jokes that apply to them and want to - everyone wants a perfectly crafted joke for them.

I like to talk about very different topics. I like to jump around a lot because I don't want people to come see me and then for an hour I tell jokes about being a little person. I just don't want that to happen. I understand that it's part of me, that's the first thing that you notice and it's something that people are curious about.

I'm such a damn workaholic, that it's interesting to be like, "Oh, what do I do for fun?"

Half the time, you go on any one of these news sites, whether it be a Yahoo or a Google, and one of the top headlines is always, "Did a comedian go too far?" or "Comedian offends." It's like, "Really? Comedian?" A person that's supposed to make funny and make silly and historically was the only person who was allowed to make fun of the king? We're the ones that you're taking seriously?

I hate that when people are like, "Well, all dwarves know each other, right?" And you want to get mad, but you can't because we do.

It's when I make a joke about Indian people and then a white person comes up to me and says, "That's wrong. You should not talk about Indian people," and the Indian people are over in the audience like, "I thought that joke was hilarious." That is so weird. Then why are you getting mad? You're burning unnecessary calories. You're getting made for the sake of getting mad. I don't understand it.

Everyone just wants to hear the exact jokes that apply to them and want to - everyone wants a perfectly crafted joke for them.