It's about showing up. And sometimes I don't do it. I almost always regret it, but sometimes I don't do it. Sometimes I walk into a situation where I'm intimidated and I want to be liked and I want to fit in, and I don't choose authenticity. And it's always pretty miserable.

One of the greatest barriers to connection is the cultural importance we place on "going it alone." Somehow we've come to equate success with not needing anyone. Many of us are willing to extend a helping hand, but we're very reluctant to reach out for help when we need it ourselves. It's as if we've divided the world into "those who offer help" and "those who need help." The truth is that we are both.

If you want to make a difference, the next time you see someone being cruel to another human being, take it personally. Take it personally because it is personal!

Vulnerability is not weakness. And that myth is profoundly dangerous.

You can’t dress rehearse the bad moments.

Our capacity for wholeheartednes s can never be greater than our willingness to be broken-hearted.

Then I tell my own story. The two things that people really need to transform is language to understand their experience and to know they're not alone. It's the combination of the researcher-storyteller part.