We cannot grow when we are in shame, and we can't use shame to change ourselves or others.

Shame works like the zoom lens on a camera. When we are feeling shame, the camera is zoomed in tight and all we see is our flawed selves, alone and struggling.(page 68)

Effort + the courage to show up = enough.

I think a lot of us are multiple things that don't always fit together neatly in a bio box.

Perfectionism is self destructive simply because there's no such thing as perfect. Perfection is an unattainable goal.

Vulnerability is not about winning, and it's not about losing. It's about having the courage to show up and be seen.

When they teach [doctors] how to suture, they also teach them how to stitch their self-worth to being all-powerful.