Of Course God does not consider you hopeless. If He did, He would not be moving you to seek Him (and He obviously is)... Continue seeking Him with seriousness. Unless He wanted you, you would not be wanting Him.

You can begin as if nothing had ever gone wrong. White as snow.

A man who first tried to guess 'what the public wants,' and then preached that as Christianity because the public wants it, would be a pretty mixture of fool and knave

Reality, in fact, is always something you couldn't have guessed. That's one of the reasons I believe Christianity. It's a religion you couldn't have guessed.

We read to know we are not alone.

A man can't be always defending the truth; there must be a time to feed on it.

But courage, child: we are all between the paws of the true Aslan.