People can be taught to hate. And people can be taught to spell. But apparently, it's one or the other.

People make changes in their life, and they blend and assimilate. They find a way to make it work. That's where I've always taken the wrong turn. By not taking a turn at all.

When a girl says, 'I can't believe I'm doing this!' just know that she had it planned from the minute she shaved

Believing there's no such thing as luck is very unlucky. Like, the worst. Beyond stealing someone's lucky four-leaf clover.

Don't sit back and be a bystander of your own life

People often say that writing is ten percent inspiration and ninety percent perspiration. This is nonsense, of course. It's pretty much one hundred percent caffeine.

Dating is like pushing your tray along in a cafeteria. Nothing looks good, but you know you have to pick something by the time you reach the cashier.