The wrong kind of praise creates self-defeating behavior. The right kind motivates students to learn.

What can I learn from this? What will I do next time I'm in this situation?

Your failures and misfortunes don't threaten other people. . .It's your assets and your successes that are problems for people who derive their self-esteem from being superior.

So what should we say when children complete a task—say, math problems—quickly and perfectly? Should we deny them the praise they have earned? Yes. When this happens, I say, “Whoops. I guess that was too easy. I apologize for wasting your time. Let’s do something you can really learn from!

More and more research is suggesting that, far from being simply encoded in the genes, much of personality is a flexible and dynamic thing that changes over the life span and is shaped by experience.

I believe ability can get you to the top,” says coach John Wooden, “but it takes character to keep you there.… It’s so easy to … begin thinking you can just ‘turn it on’ automatically, without proper preparation. It takes real character to keep working as hard or even harder once you’re there. When you read about an athlete or team that wins over and over and over, remind yourself, ‘More than ability, they have character.'

Important achievements require a clear focus, all-out effort, and a bottomless trunk full of strategies. Plus allies in learning.