Don't freight your answers with any notions of what you're "supposed" to do, and just see where your feelings point you. It can feel weird to be so formal about it, but if you're not used to doing it, then there's no shame in retraining yourself.
Carolyn HaxAttractions are things we all should be good at saying no to, because our Department of Attraction is arguably the least reliable and productive office in our entire brain.
Carolyn HaxLive in the moment, this moment, your moment. That is by far and without meaningful rival The Best Position to put yourself in to discover and delight in who your children turn out to be, whoever they turn out to be.
Carolyn Hax