This is a world where everybody’s gotta do something. Ya know, somebody laid down this rule that everybody’s gotta do something, they gotta be something. You know, a dentist, a glider pilot, a narc, a janitor, a preacher, all that . . . Sometimes I just get tired of thinking of all the things that I don’t wanna do. All the things that I don’t wanna be. Places I don’t wanna go, like India, like getting my teeth cleaned. Save the whale, all that, I don’t understand that . . .

I don't know about other people, but when I wake up in the morning and put my shoes on, I think, Jesus Christ, now what?

you boys can keep your virgins give me hot old women in high heels with asses that forgot to get old.

I would certainly end up forever crying the blues into a coffee cup in a park for old men playing chess or silly games of some sort.

it's better to be happy...if you can..!!

I have two rules. One is, never trust a man who smokes a pipe. The other is, never trust a man with shiny shoes.

If there are junk yards in hell, love is the dog that guards the gates.