Former President George W. Bush has hired a man to lead his presidential think tank in Dallas. The man was hired because he was the only candidate who could say the words, 'George W. Bush think tank' with a straight face.

In Sarah Palin's new book, she says when she first laid eyes on her future husband, she said out loud, 'Thank you, God,' which is the same thing the Democrats said when they first laid eyes on Sarah Palin.

When reached for comment on the charges, Martha didn't say much, (only) that a subpoena should be served with a nice appetizer.

St.Patrick's Day is named for St. Patrick, the first guy to feed Guinness to a snake.

According to a brand new report, alcohol abuse in Ireland is on the rise. Mainly because the guy who didn't drink now does.

It's a mistake to read. Television is the only way.

Santa will be showing up with Rudolph the Red-Eyed Reindeer.