MSNBC has abruptly ended their relationship with Keith Olbermann, and according to his contract he's not allowed back on television for at least six months. Or as industry experts call it, The Conan.

Don't be cynical; it leads nowhere. If you work hard, and are kind, amazing things will happen to you.

Election officials say that in 2016, it may be possible to vote for the president on your smartphone. Can you imagine that? With one swipe you can choose a president and at the same time tell him or her where you want to hook up.

Republican Congressman Duncan Hunter has filed papers to run for president. But in his official filing, he misspelled the word 'president.' Political experts say it's all part of Hunter's plan to attract Bush supporters.

Barack Obama, you know has a lot of supporters here in America, but he's very popular internationally. It's quite interesting. This is a true story. It was in the paper. Barack Obama is so popular in the African town where his father was born, they've named a beer after him. That's true. Yeah. So next time you're in Africa, sit back, relax, and enjoy a tall, cold Barackelob Light. Good enough. Clearly not as popular a beer as it used to be.

I like being tested. I get as scared as anyone. But the feeling of putting yourself on the line, betting on your talent and having it work; that's the most exhilarating feeling in the world.

Just taught my kids about taxes by eating 38% of their ice cream.