In the Year 2000 the discovery of extraterrestrial life will create a revolution in science, art, and pornography.
Conan O'BrienBarry Bonds in the news. Yesterday Barry Bonds' agent said that Bonds could hit as many as 1,000 home runs. And the agent admitted he's on more drugs than Barry Bonds.
Conan O'BrienToday, Angelina Jolie met with Pope Francis at the Vatican. Long story short: She adopted him.
Conan O'BrienNobody knows really what they're doing and there's two ways to go with that information. One is to be afraid and the other is to be liberated, and I choose to be liberated by it.
Conan O'Brien